The Wizard of Oz
by Mothball-Milkshake
Summary: Yes, you read right. No, this isn't in the wrong category. One of our favourite Konoha shinobi is thrown into an unfamiliar world, where an evil wizard is after them and they just want to get home. Naruto/Wizard of Oz crossover.
1. Chapter 1

"But mum…" Kiba whined, "Akamaru doesn't want to go to the pound

**Disclaimer – This story is based on characters and situations created by Masashi Kishimoto and L. Frank Baum. The lyrics were written by Harold Arlen and E.Y Harburg. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made. Thank you. **

"But mum…" Kiba whined, "Akamaru doesn't want to go to the pound!"

"I'm really sorry dear, but Orochimaru is complaining that Akamaru is an unmanageable beast, and if he doesn't get put down, he'll destroy Konoha. It's the Hokage's orders…" his mother replied sadly.

"No! I won't let you take him!" Kiba yelled, panicked, as he hugged Akamaru tightly. The small dog whimpered.

"Kiba, mum's right, now give him to the nice ANBU member currently standing outside our door…" his sister butted in, with a dejected look on her face.

"He hasn't done anything wrong! He's supposed to attack! That's what he is!" Kiba shouted desperately at the ANBU representative. The man wearing a raccoon mask shrugged helplessly.

"Kiba...come on, give him to me…there's a good boy…" his mother soothed, gently taking the dog out of his arms and handing it to the ANBU official.

"Why?! Why are you letting them do this? I hate you! I hate all of you!" Kiba yelled, tears streaming down his face, ignoring the distraught look on his mother's face as he ran to his room, slamming the door behind him.

He fell onto the bed, staring at the ceiling for a while, depressed at the thought of how scared Akamaru must be. Finally wiping his eyes, he rolled over and stared out the window, humming slightly to himself, for some reason feeling an odd urge to burst into song, quite a strange reaction to the current events.

"_Somewhere…over the rainbow…"_ he started softly, in a smooth, somewhat deep voice.

"_Way up high…" _Upon realizing that this was cheering him up slightly, he sat up, looking over at the Hokage's office, which was probably where Akamaru has been taken.

"_There's a land that I've heard of, once in a lullaby…" _Starting to sing louder now, he walked over to the window.

"_Some…where…over the rainbow! Skies are blue…And the dreams that you dare to dream, really do come true…" _taking a last look at the cloudy, grey skies outside, he turned around and walked to his closet.

"_Someday I'll wish upon a star and wake up where the clouds are far behind…me…" _he sang, opening the closet doors to reveal a wall of photos of him and Akamaru.

"_Where troubles melt like lemon drops away above the chimney tops, that's where…you'll…find…me…"_ he smiled at a picture of Akamaru running down the street with his mother's underwear.

"_Somewhere, over the rainbow…bluebirds…fly…" _he turned away from the closet, shutting the doors behind him as he started to pick up some of Akamaru's toys from the floor.

"_Birds fly, over the rainbow…why, then? Oh why, can't, I?" _Dumping the armful of toys into Akamaru's basket in the corner, he turned back to his bed.

"_If happy little bluebirds fly, beyond the rainbow, why, oh why…can't…I?" _He finished, collapsing back onto the bed and putting his head in his hands.

"Ark!" he heard a high pitched bark, and looked up just in time to see Akamaru jump through his window.

"Akamaru! You came back!" he said gleefully, picking up the puppy and hugging him tightly. "You came back…" he muttered into his fur. Suddenly holding Akamaru out in front of him, he looked him in the eye. "They'll come find you… we have to get away! We have to run away!" he told Akamaru seriously, before putting him on the floor and throwing some things into a knapsack.

Akamaru whined and cocked his head to the side.

"I don't know where we're going, boy, but we can't stay here. Come on!"

"Ark!" Akamaru replied as he settled himself on Kiba's head, Kiba lifting himself out of the window.

Looking up and down the street, Kiba quickly ran down it turned a corner, happy to see that everybody was inside. Vaguely wondering why nobody was out, he continued down the street until he was clear of houses or buildings, and just now into open land.

_I wonder how far the boundaries of Konoha go…_ he thought absentmindedly, turning left down a fork in the road.

_Hang on…is that…Shikamaru? _He thought in confusion as he saw the other boy leaning against some rocks and apparently cooking some sort of meat.

"Hey, what are you doing all the way out here?" Shikamaru said, glancing up as Kiba walked closer. "Oh, wait, don't tell me you're running away?" he asked, catching sight of Kiba's knapsack.

"What's it to you?" replied Kiba testily. "And what are _you_ doing all the way out here, anyway?"

"Cooking," Shikamaru answered unhelpfully, gesturing at the sausages on a stick, which he was holding over a small fire.

"Ark!" Akamaru contributed, perking up at the smell.

Seeing the still confused look on Kiba's face, he spoke up again. "Choji steals all the food otherwise. Out here is the only place I can actually eat what I cook."

Kiba nodded in understanding, not noticing when Akamaru jumped silently onto the ground and started pulling a sausage off Shikamaru's cooking stick.

"Hey! Akamaru!" he said, finally catching sight of what his puppy was doing. "Don't do that! We haven't been asked yet!"

Shikamaru laughed. "Oh, don't worry about it. There's plenty more where that came from. Now, tell me, why are you running away?" he asked, adopting a more serious tone.

"Because they want to take Akamaru away from me…" Kiba told him, sitting down on a log and watching the small dog attempt to eat a sausage that was almost as big as his head.

"Ah. Well, don't you think you're mother and sister might be worried about you? I mean, just think about how much they've each taken care of you. Remember that time you got the chicken pox? Who stayed by your side and comforted you?" Shikamaru asked, a glint in his eye.

"My…mother…" Kiba answered, remembering.

"Don't you reckon they'll be awfully sad if you leave?"

"Probably…my mum sometimes worries so much she makes herself sick…oh, god! What if she gets sick because she's worrying about me? I have to go! Akamaru, come on!" Kiba said frantically, zipping his coat up once Akamaru jumped inside.

"But weren't you running away?" Shikamaru asked, poking at his dying fire.

"No time for that! Thanks, Shikamaru, see you later!" Kiba answered, running off.

Shikamaru watched him leave, then looked up at the clouds. "Man…looks like there's gunna be a storm…now I have to go home too…what a drag…" he muttered to himself, picking up his things.

Kiba ran down the road, even as the wind started to pick up. Finally nearing his house, he started yelling. "Mum! Hana!" he tried pulling the front door open, but it wouldn't budge with the wind pelting it. Akamaru whimpered and burrowed deeper inside his jacket.

"It's okay boy…they're probably out the…back…" he trailed off as he saw what looked like a tornado coming in from the distance.

"Shit…" he muttered, running around to the backyard, where he knew they had a shelter for this type of thing. "Mum! Let me in! It's me! Kiba!" he shouted, banging on the wooden doors of the underground shelter, but his mother obviously couldn't hear him over the roaring wind. He could see the twister coming even closer, and pulled the back door open, shouting in alarm as it was ripped off its hinges and into the sky. Dashing inside, he avoided flying cabinets and chairs, and slammed the door to his own room, throwing himself onto the bed and covering his head with his arms, but making sure not to squash Akamaru in the process. He yelled again as he heard something hit the side of the house, then felt a shudder go through it. Suddenly, everything was quieter, and he looked up and out the window. Seeing only grey sky, he stood up, and, holding the wall, carefully made his way over to the open window.

He gasped as he saw that he wasn't even on the ground anymore – the entire house had been ripped off the ground and was now spinning around inside the twister. He could see Ichiraku's ramen bar float past, Iruka still inside, eating quite happily. Iruka turned and waved at him, smiling, before going back to the bowl. Kiba waved back slowly, staring numbly as Sasuke floated by, sitting on a log and resting on his hands, seemingly oblivious to the fact that he was inside a tornado. He continued watching as Gai, Neji and Lee floated by, Neji and Lee apparently training with each other, and Gai encouraging them. Gai looked up and gave Kiba a thumbs up before he was drags out of sight by either the wind or by the spinning of Kiba's own house. Kiba was about to turn around and go back to the bed when he saw Sakura, Ino and Tenten float by, all in their pajamas and all either painting their nails, braiding another's hair or reading a magazine. Kiba smirked in a slightly perverted way.

_Must have been having a sleepover…_ he thought, before getting dizzy and falling back onto the bed. He didn't know how long he stayed in the air, but he finally felt a thump, and everything went eerily quiet.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer – This story is based on characters and situations created by Masashi Kishimoto and L

Disclaimer – This story is based on characters and situations created by Masashi Kishimoto and L. Frank Baum. The lyrics were written by Harold Arlen and E.Y Harburg. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made. Thank you.

Kiba slowly made his way to the front door, pausing to let a shivering Akamaru leap back inside his jacket.

"It's okay boy…" he murmured, patting the dog on the head and pushing open the front door with his free hand. He had to blink a few times to fully take in what he saw. The bright colours and tiny houses that met his sight befuddled him to no end as he took a few tentative steps outside.

"Akamaru…" he muttered. "I have a feeling we're not in Konoha anymore…"

Poking at a rather fake looking flower, he looked up as Akamaru whimpered to see a glowing, pink ball of light floating towards him. Backing up as the light got bigger, panic flooded him. He was just about to turn and run back into his house when the ball took on a human shape, and he was able to recognize it.

"H-Hokage-sama!" he stammered out as Tsunade materialized from the light. The only odd thing was she was wearing a giant, puffy, pale pink dress.

Odd giggling erupted from around him and he looked around, startled.

The woman who so resembled the village Hokage smiled fondly at him. "No dear. That's not my name," she said, smiling again as more giggling came from the bushes.

_Dear? Okay, this definitely isn't the Tsunade-sama I know…_ Kiba thought, once again looking around for the source of the high-pitched laughter.

"What is that?" he asked, frustrated.

"That's just the Munchkins. They want me to ask whether you are a good witch, or a bad witch?" the lady asked, smiling encouragingly.

"What the…I'm not a witch at all…I'm Inuzuka Kiba, from Konoha…" Kiba answered in confusion.

"Oh…" the woman said, frowning slightly. "Well is that the witch?" she pointed her star tipped wand at Akamaru.

"Who, Akamaru? Akamaru's my dog…" he replied, wanting to get away from this seemingly insane woman.

The lady giggled. "Well, I'm a little muddled! The Munchkins called me because a new witch, has just dropped a house on the Wicked Witch of the East."

Kiba looked around to see a pair of feet sticking out from under the house, wearing red sandals.

"And so," she interrupted his staring. "What the Munchkins want to know is whether you're a good witch, or a bad witch."

"But I already told you, I'm not a witch at all. I'm a shinobi, from Konoha. Besides, witches are old, and ugly!" Kiba said, thinking back to some picture books he'd had when he was young.

That irritating laughter erupted from around him again, apparently closer now. Kiba jumped.

"What was that?" he asked.

"The Munchkins. They're laughing, because I am a witch. I'm Tsunade, the Witch of the North," she said, smiling again.

_It __is__ Tsunade-sama! But…she thinks she's a witch…okay, since she seems so much different, I'll just…go along with her…_ Kiba thought.

"You are? Oh, I'm sorry, I've never heard of a hot witch before," he told her, smirking.

Tsunade's eyes twinkled. "Only bad witches are ugly. The Munchkins are happy because you have freed them from the Wicked Witch of the East,"

"Oh…but…what the Hell are Munchkins?" Kiba asked, looking back around at the legs of the so-call 'Wicked Witch of the East'.

Tsunade seemed affronted by his language, but answered nonetheless. "The little people who live in this land. It's Munchkin land. And you are the national hero!"

Kiba liked the sound of that, and puffed out his chest proudly, thumbing his headband as he grinned. "Ah…well…it was nothing…"

Tsunade looked around, and said in ringing tones, "It's alright. You may all come out and thank him."

Kiba looked around doubtfully, then jumped as she started to sing.

"_Come out, come out, wherever you are! And meet the shinobi, who fell from a star!"_

Suddenly, people about half Kiba's height started emerging from bushes, trees, behind houses, and any other hiding place you could think of, all dressed in the standard Chunin outfit, bar a few, who were wearing strange black cloaks with red patterns on them.

_They must be the town officials or belong to some club or something…_ Kiba reasoned, watching the miniature ninjas.

"_He fell from the sky, he fell very far! Konoha he says is the name of the star!" _Tsunade continued.

"_Konoha he says is the name of the star!"_ the 'Munchkins' piped up.

Tsunade leant down to sing directly to some of the Munchkins. _"He brings you good news, or haven't you heard? When he fell from Konoha…_" she straightened up and looked at Kiba, who felt very self-conscious at that moment.

"_A miracle occurred…" _she finished.

Kiba shuffled uneasily, before feeling that odd urge to explain himself through song come over him once more.

"_It really was no miracle, what happened was just this!"_ he sang, jumping up onto the edge of a small fountain.

"_The wind began to switch, the house, to pitch! And suddenly the hinges started to, unhitch!"_ he gestured along with the words, watching the people's eyes go wide.

"_Just then, the witch, to satisfy an itch, went flying on his broomstick, thumbing for a hitch!"_

"_And oh, what happened then was rich!" _Kiba started as a Munchkin who oddly resembled somebody he thought was called Kotetsu stepped up.

Suddenly all the Munchkins were singing at each other, as though telling one another important news.

"_The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch, it landed on the Wicked Witch in the middle of a ditch! And landed on the Wicked Witch in the middle of a ditch! Which, was not a healthy situation for, the Wicked Witch!"_ Kiba watched as they ran around to each other, serious looks on their faces.

"_The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch, it landed on the Wicked Witch in the middle of a ditch! And landed on the Wicked Witch in the middle of a ditch! Which, was not a healthy situation for, the Wicked Witch! Who began to twitch, and was reduced, to just a snitch! Of what was once, the Wicked…Witch!"_

Kiba felt a bead of sweat appear on his head as somebody he recognized as Izumo walked up to him.

"We thank you very sweetly, for doing it so neatly," he half sang.

"You've killed her so completely, that we thank you, very sweetly," added Kotetsu.

Kiba let out a sigh, thinking that the song was over, when Tsunade spoke up again.

"Let the joyous news be spread, the wicked old witch at last is dead!"

Kiba had to cover his ears at the outburst of shouting from the Munchkins. They may be small, but they sure were noisy.

_Ding dong, the witch is dead, which old witch? The wicked witch! Ding dong the wicked witch is dead! Wake up, you sleepy head, rub your eyes, get out of bed, sing song the wicked witch is dead! She's gone where the goblins go, below, below, below yo-ho! Let's open up and sing, and ring the bells out! Ding dong, the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low, let them know, the wicked witch is dead!"_

Kiba sat down on the edge of the fountain as they continued to repeat this chorus and dance around. He rubbed his temples before noticing a small redheaded Munchkin in one of those Black cloaks approaching him.

"_As mayor of the Munchkin city, in the county of the land of Oz. I welcome you, most regally!"_

"_But we've got to verify it legally!" _another Munchkin in a black robe, female this time, and with blue hair, interrupted. "_To see!"_ she continued.

"_To see."_

"_If she!"_

"_If she?"_

"_Is morally, ethically."_

"_Spiritually, physically!" _sang the mayor, catching on.

"Positively, absolutely," another Munchkin, also with a cloak and some strange appendage resembling a flytrap attached to his head contributed.

"_Undeniably, and reliably, dead!" _they finished together.

"As coroner, I must offer, I thoroughly examined her! And she's not only merely dead, she's really, most sincerely dead!" sang a Munchkin that Kiba vaguely recognized as being named Kabuto. At least in his world, anyway.

"Then this is a day of independence! For all the Munchkins, and their descendants!" the mayor spoke up again.

"If any!" the blue haired Munchkin interrupted.

"Yes! Let the joyous news be spread, the wicked old witch, at last is dead!" the mayor finished with a large flourish of his arm.

Kiba put his face in his hand in exasperation as they began what he now labeled the chorus once more. Patting Akamaru on the head, he wondered when the song would be over.

"_We represent, the lullaby league, the lullaby league, the lullaby league! And in the name of, the lullaby league! We wish to welcome you to Munchkin land!"_ several girls sang while doing some sort of ballet dance in front of him. His eye twitched as three boys, all wearing the black cloak, danced in front of him in turn.

"_We represent, the lollipop guild, the lollipop guild, the lollipop guild!"_ they sang. And, indeed, one of them did have some kind of swirly mask on, while the other two merely held lollipops, the blonde guy looking very disgruntled, and another red-haired guy merely rather bored. _"And in the name of, the lollipop guild! We wish to welcome you to Munchkin land!" _they finished.

"_We welcome you to Munchkin land! La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!" _they all sang as they pulled Kiba up to dance with them. _"From now on you'll be history!" _contributed the mayor.

"_You'll be his-"_

"_You'll be his-"_

"_You'll be history!" _the blue haired girl and the plant headed guy took turns in singing.

"_And we will glorify your name!" _the three sang together. _"You'll be a bust-"_

"_Be a bust!"_

"_Be a bust!" _

"_In the hall of fame!" _they finished in unison.

The Munchkins continued their happy singing, until a loud bang broke in, coupled with a burst of green smoke, from atop one of the small houses. The Munchkins ran for cover, but Kiba stood there, having no idea what was going on. Finally, the smoke cleared, to reveal a person with long black hair and robes standing on the roof.

"I thought you said she was dead?" Kiba asked of Tsunade, who had somehow managed to get beside him.

"No, you killed the Wicked Witch of the East – this is the Wicked Wizard of the West!" she answered. "Yes, Wizard," she added at Kiba's doubtful look. "And he's worse than the other one was."

"Hah! Yes, it is I, Orochimaru, the Wicked Wizard of the West! …Who killed my container?" said the – er – man, stalking over to where the house lay upon the body of the Witch of the East. "Who killed the witch of the East? Was it you!?" he shouted, looking at Kiba.

"No, well, yes, actually – it was an accident!" he said, seeing the look upon the Wizard's face.

"Well my little pretty…" Orochimaru said, pausing to look Kiba up and down and nodding appreciatively. Kiba felt oddly violated. "I can cause accidents too!" the Wizard finished.

"Aren't you forgetting the ruby sandals?" Tsunade asked innocently.

"The sandals…yes!" Orochimaru muttered, walking back over to the pair of legs. Kiba saw the sandals vanish, and the legs roll up on themselves under the house.

"They're gone!" he shouted, turning around in anger. "The ruby slippers, what have you done with them?" he asked, turning on Tsunade.

"It's too late, there they are, and there they'll stay!" she told him, pointing at Kiba's feet.

_Ah…crap…who the Hell wears red sandals? _Kiba thought dejectedly, seeing the sandals upon his own feet.

"Give me back my sandals…I'm the only one who knows how to use them! They're of no use to you!" Orochimaru told Kiba.

"Keep tight inside of them, their magic must be very powerful, or he wouldn't want them so much!" Tsunade whispered in his ear.

"You stay out of this Tsunade!" Orochimaru interjected angrily. "Or I'll fix you as well!" he threatened.

Tsunade laughed. "Rubbish! You have no power here! Be gone! Before somebody drops a house on you!"

Orochimaru ducked down and looked above him as though what she said was entirely plausible.

"Very well…I'll bide my time…but as for you, my…fine man!" Orochimaru said, turning and looking at Kiba once again. "Just try to stay out of my way…just try! I'll get you, my pretty…and your little dog, too!" he said, pointing at Akamaru. Kiba hugged him protectively. Orochimaru laughed maniacally before vanishing in a puff of smoke.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer – This story is based on characters and situations created by Masashi Kishimoto and L. Frank Baum. The lyrics were written by Harold Arlen and E.Y Harburg. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made. Thank you.**

Kiba stood there in silence for a moment.

"It's alright, you can get up, he's gone!" Tsunade called out, which seemed to signal they small beings ability to stand again.

Kiba looked around cautiously; quite afraid they were going to start singing again. Once it was obvious they were finished, for now, he looked back at Tsunade.

"Can you tell me how to get back to Konoha?" he asked, apprehensively, unnerved by her continued smile.

"Well, I can't help you myself. You'll have to see the Wizard!"

"The Wizard? But wasn't he just here?" Kiba asked, feeling more dubious by the second.

Tsunade let out a tinkling laugh.

"Oh, no, silly boy! You need to see the Wizard of Oz!"

"Of Oz?"

"Yes, of Oz! He's the wisest man we've ever heard tell about."

The 'Munchkins' nodded in agreement.

"Okay…well…how do I get to Oz?" Kiba asked, starting to feel very tired of going around in circles with this Tsunade look-a-like.

"That's very simple, dear. You just follow, the yellow, brick road…" she said, fading back into the pink, glowing orb she had arrived in.

"Follow the yellow brick road?!" Kiba yelled after her, "What the Hell are you talking about? Follow the yellow brick road…" he mused to himself.

"Follow the yellow brick road," the red haired Munchkin from before stepped out and told him, pointing to a brick road, which was, indeed, yellow.

The blue haired girl stepped out. "Follow the yellow brick road!" she said importantly, nodding at him.

"Follow the yellow brick road!" another one repeated.

Kiba sighed as they began to sing again.

"_Follow the yellow brick road, _

_Follow the yellow brick road,_

_Follow, follow, follow, follow,_

_Follow the yellow brick road!"_

As they sang, they led him down the small path, Akamaru yapping at their heels.

"_Follow the yellow brick, _

_Follow the yellow brick, _

_Follow the yellow brick road!_

_You're off to see the Wizard,_

_The wonderful Wizard of Oz!_

_You'll find he is a wiz of a wiz,_

_If ever a wiz there was!_

_If ever oh ever a wiz there was,_

_The Wizard of Oz is one because,_

_Because, because, because, because, because!_

_Because of the wonderful things he does!_

_You're off to see the wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz!_

Finishing their song, they waved him off at the borders of Munchkin land. He waved back, nervously, and hastened out of their sight.

"Follow the yellow brick road," he muttered to himself, looking down. "Follow the yellow brick…" looking up, he realized he had come to a fork in the road.

"Well now which way do we go?" he said aloud. Akamaru whimpered.

"Oi, that way's good!" came a voice from behind them. Kiba jumped.

"Who said that?!"

Akamaru replied by barking at a very blonde, very familiar looking, orange-jumpsuit wearing boy, hanging from a post with one arm pointed to the left. On closer inspection, Kiba realized something…

"Ah, Akamaru! That's a scarecrow! Scarecrows don't talk!" he laughed.

"Then again, that's way's good as well," came the same voice. Kiba looked up again to see the scarecrow, still as ever, pointing right.

"Uh…wasn't he pointing the other way?" Kiba asked, nervously. Akamaru shivered behind his legs.

"Of course, some people go both ways!" and as he watched, the scarecrow folded his arms over and pointed in either direction.

Kiba stared, twitching at it for a few seconds.

"Hey! You are talking, aren't you!" he poked the figure with one of his kunai.

"Ow…" the boy muttered, before shaking his head in a clear 'no'. He then nodded his head 'yes'. And then shrugged.

Kiba punched him. "Are you being an idiot on purpose, or can't you make up your mind?"

"Hey! That was mean!" it shouted at him. Then mumbled dejectedly. "But that's the problem. I can't make up my mind. I haven't got a brain. Only straw…" the scarecrow demonstrated this by pulling some straw from its ear.

Kiba looked on in sick fascination. "But…uh…how are you talking if you haven't got a brain?" he asked, finally. Akamaru was now sniffing around the base of the stick holding the scarecrow up.

It frowned. "I don't know. But some people who don't have a brain, talk a Hell of a lot, right?" he beamed.

"Well…I guess…" Kiba answered, thinking of some people he knew back home. "Anyway…we haven't met, have we?" he asked, uncertain.

The scarecrow shook his head.

"Uh…how are you?" Kiba asked, sticking out his hand.

"The scarecrow nodded. "How are you?" and shook his hand.

"I'm…alright, thank you," Kiba answered.

"Ah, I'm not at all alright! It's bloody painful being stuck up here all day with a pole up your back!" the scarecrow answered in a whining tone.

"Oh…yeah, I guess you have a point…" Kiba answered, rubbing the back of his head and casting his eyes around for an escape route. "Er, can't you get down?"

"Down? If I could get down do you think I'd still be stuck up here?!" it answered, rudely.

"Well fine, let me help!" Kiba said, walking around to the back of the scarecrow.

"Oh…well…uhm…thanks…." It mumbled, abashed.

"Hmm. Nope, I'm lost. What do I do?" Kiba asked, poking the pole at the back of the scarecrow.

"Well, I'm not really bright about doing things…but maybe if you bend that nail, I'll slip off!"

Kiba complied, only to have the heap of talking straw land at his feet.

"Woah! Man, you all right?" he asked.

"Oops, there goes some of me again! Don't worry, I just pick it up and put it back in again!" the scarecrow answered, pushing some straw down his pants.

"Oh, it's so good to be free!" it announced, getting to his feet and promptly falling onto Kiba.

"H-hey!" Kiba yelled, pushing him back off.

"Did I scare ya?" he asked.

"Well…no, not really. I just don't like guys falling all over me," Kiba informed him.

"But…I didn't scare you?" he mumbled, before sighing. "I didn't think so…" he looked dejectedly up at a crow landing on his shoulder. "Boo! Get lost!" he attempted to swat it away. "You see? I can't even scare a crow. I'm a failure, because I haven't got a brain!" he whined, tugging at his hair.

"Okay, this is getting ridiculous, I know you don't have a brain, but do you have a name?" Kiba asked, irritated.

"Er…no, not really."

"Right. Since you remind so much of an idiot back home, I'm calling you Naruto."

"Okay!" the newly christened Naruto-scarecrow grinned at him.

"Anyway…what would you do if you had a brain?" Kiba asked, curiously. He immediately regretted it, for apparently it was the trigger for Naruto to start singing.

"_I could while away the hours,_

_Conferring with the flowers,_

_Consulting with the rain."_

He grinned up innocently from his spot on the floor. Kiba leant against the fence, sighed, and crossed his arms.

"_And my head, I'd be scratching,_

_While my thoughts were busy hatching,_

_If I only had a brain…"_

Finally getting to his feet, he wobbled across to Kiba's fence.

"_I'd unravel every riddle,_

_For any individ'l, _

_In trouble or in pain."_

"_With the thoughts you'd be thinking, _

_You could be another Lincoln,_

_If you only had a brain…"_

Kiba stared in horror at Naruto for making him sing again. Though of course, it wasn't Naruto's fault, but he had nobody else to blame.

"Oh I! Could tell you why…

_The ocean's near the shore!_

_I could think of things I never thunk before!_

_And then I'd sit…"_

He collapsed back onto the ground, striking a thoughtful pose. Kiba held his head in his hands from embarrassment.

"And think some more!

_I would not be just a nothing,_

_My head all-full of stuffing,_

_My heart all-full of pain…_

_I would dance and be merry; life would be a ding-a-derry,_

_If I only had a brain…"_

He stood up again, tumbling forwards, attempting to get his balance.

Kiba clapped once it was apparent he was not to be singing any more. "Wonderful. Great. Are you done?"

Naruto put a thumbs up from his position, face first against the ground.

"If my scarecrow did that, the crows would be scared shitless. Well, maybe not the falling over part," Kiba mused, holding out a hand to help Naruto up.

"Really?" he grinned. Kiba nodded absent-mindedly. "Er…where do you live?"

"Konoha. And I want to get home so badly that I'm going all the way to Emerald City to get the Wizard of Oz to help me."

"You're going to see a wizard? Cool!" Naruto said, incredulously. "Hey, if I went too, would he give me a brain?"

Kiba shrugged.

"…Can I come?" Naruto said hopefully.

Kiba sighed, knowing that whatever he answered, Naruto would follow him. "Fine."

"YAY! We're off the see a wizard!" Naruto jumped gleefully, stumbling as he landed.

Kiba struggled to keep him standing. "No offence, buddy, but you're not starting off great."

"Oh, I'll try!" Naruto insisted, earnestly.

"To Oz?" Kiba asked.

"To Oz!" came the reply, Naruto pointing forward importantly.

Kiba jumped when Naruto looped his arm through his, then cursed inwardly as that inexplicable urge to sing came over him once again.

"We're…off to see the Wizard! The wonderful Wizard of Oz!"

Damn it, as if singing wasn't bad enough, now he was skipping down the road, Akamaru looking up at him doubtfully. Naruto was clearly enjoying the skipping and singing.

"We hear he is a wiz of a wiz,

_If ever a wiz there was._

_If ever, oh ever, a wiz there was,_

_The Wizard of Oz is one because,_

_Because, because, because, because, because…_

_Because of the wonderful things he does!_

_We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!"_


End file.
